BOY RACER

You may recall that the last time I wrote, we were just about to embark on our first family skiing holiday – well we have all returned in one piece and had a wonderful time. To say we were slightly apprehensive would be an understatement – our son Noah does not take well to changes in his routine and although he loves being on holiday after the first few days, he does take a little while to “acclimatise himself” shall we say.

Before we left, we decided that the children should be enrolled in ski school for the week. Six-year-old Alice was delighted at the prospect of possibly making new friends. Noah on the other hand took a slightly different view. “But I don’t need to go to ski school, I can ski already!!” This coming from the veteran of one-and-a-half hours on the local dry ski slope. Children with ADHD are often oppositional and will challenge decisions made by an adult on a regular basis just for the hell of it! To say we have been living with a teenager for the past six years and knowing that Noah is only 12 may give you a better idea of what I am getting at!

The galling thing about Noah thinking he didn’t need to go to ski-school was that he was probably right! Many people with ADHD are especially good in areas such as sport, drama, the arts and music. Whatever sport Noah attempts he seems to have a natural affinity with. The fact that some ADHD people have a minimal sense of danger, boundless energy, take risks and totally focus on the task in hand may make it easier to understand why some of our most successful sportspeople have ADHD traits. (Contact me for a list of famous people with ADHD – a great esteem booster for ADHD kids and adults alike!!)

So – much to Noah’s disgust he was enrolled in ski-school. “Ungrateful child!” I can hear you muttering - yes he is ungrateful, he has little sense of how his words and actions affect others, saying and doing things without thinking. This is the way of ADHD and we just have to get on with it, showing him the right way over and over again in the hope that he may learn how to get on better with other people.

The first day in ski-school was a complete disaster, Alice spent more time on her well-padded bottom than in the required vertical position, (even at six she is rather image conscious and I have to admit it did nothing for her carefully coiffed hairdo with her ski-hat perched at a precarious angle and sunglasses barely covering one eye!!). Noah, after two hours got rather bored with “going up and down on some stupid rope”, fell over once laughing so much at his sister and decided to make his way to the nearest blue run. Which for the uninitiated amongst you is rather more difficult than the tame, almost horizontal runs in the 4-13 year olds ski-school!

We managed to persuade him to return to ski-school that afternoon dangling the carrot of a “go on the button-lift with his dad.” After the second day, Noah never looked back; he dutifully returned to ski-school most days, partly because of his super-cool, tanned, long-haired and totally on his level instructor, Dura, but also so he could meet up with his new pal “Jesus”.

The two of them had given each other nicknames, Noah was…”God”!! I knew better than to ask why. It wasn’t long though before I found out. To see my son launching himself out of the heavens, hurtling down a red run at goodness knows how many miles an hour, without fear, deftly weaving in and out of other more experienced skiers without any inclination whatsoever for his own safety and emerging flushed, breathless and totally in his element was enough for any mother to know that this was what he was supposed to be doing.

There was also another reason for his sudden enthusiasm for ski-school…THE RACE. At the end of the week each member of the class would be timed down a blue-run slalom and the fastest would be rewarded with a medal. If you know anything about ADHD children it will be that they respond magnificently to a challenge – they love competition and Noah is no exception.

ADHD people often are easily bored; once they have mastered a skill they are ready to move onto something else so we were totally expecting Noah to request snowboarding lessons or to have a bash at ski-blading – it never happened.

It’s at times like these that I know where my hopes and dreams for Noah’s future lie. To see him totally at one with himself, immersed in a sport or an activity – not anxious, argumentative or oppositional - is such a rare treat for us. We noticed that as with other sports or adrenaline-producing activities, Noah is calm, relaxed and so much better behaved for a short while – sometimes up to a couple of hours. Then his symptoms return and we reluctantly give him his medication.

Back to THE RACE – Noah rarely listens to advice and this occasion was no different. The words “Bat” and “Hell” came to mind as he hurtled off down the slope. I knew it was too good to be true – falling seemed inevitable and he was furious! But Dura shouted at him not to give up – he finished the race on one ski and was allowed a second attempt! I had to turn away as he started his second go. “Wow” shouted Buzz as he sprayed to a finish. Needless to say he won with seconds to spare and proudly sported his gold medal day and night until his Grandpa had seen it and given the seal of approval!

Until next time,

Jan

Jan Assheton RGN RSCN is an Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) Coach and Learning Mentor and the mother of a child with ADHD. She will be sharing the benefits of her personal and professional experience every two weeks.

NEXT INSTALMENT: FRIDAY 26 APRIL