Content |
Oh Mark, I am so so sorry, this must be a horrid time for you with Christmas approaching.
When my daughter died the first Christmas was very hard, but I have my own beliefs that got me through it (I like to believe that we go on when we die, are reincarnated, if you read a Doris Stokes book you will see what I mean, her books brought me real comfort and a lot of tears after my daughters death and I would recommend them to you and your wife. They draw a picture of our loved ones watching over us after they leave, and explain that leaving this world is like walking through a door into another world which we all move on to so some day we will meet up with each other again, I found that very comforting. They also note that a relative on the other side greets and stays with those who have passed, which I found comforting as the thought of my daughter all alone really tore me apart as a mother.
It gets easier eventually, but in the meantime you all need to talk about how you feel, if not to each other then to an outsider who is trained to help, although my husband and I talked a lot, and that gets easier with time, the early days were horrid.
I have my bad days even now, but the worst times of year in addition to Christmas, are her birthday in the Spring and the date she died Feb.
My thoughts are with you and if you or your wife need to share how you are feeling with someone, I am here, I too have boys, my eldest is 11 years, then I have an 8 year old and a baby daughter 13mths, who I never thought I'd have.
Big huggs to you and your family.
Teresa |
